Recently, my attention was drawn, via Facebook, to two
different blogs by two separate bloggers (can’t remember if I were sent them by
the same person) dealing with the same problem: why the church is losing
millennials. In both cases, they were
appended with notes that read something like, “Well-written article.”
And they were. They
both contained nothing but correctly spelled words, the grammar was impeccable,
and the syntax was fully paid-up for the fiscal quarter.
They were also remarkably similar.
Not just with each other, but with articles that I was
emailed ten years ago with a headline of “Why Generation X is leaving the
church”, which greatly mirrored articles sent via snail mail from 30 years ago
with titles like, “Why the baby boomers are leaving the church.” Go back far enough, and someone was probably
writing a missive on papyrus about why the Iron Age was leaving the synagogue.
Now, both of you who are still reading to this point, don’t
get me wrong. I’m not saying that the
articles are wrong, I just find it interesting that every generation has to get
to the point where they think they’ve got it right.
Take these two articles I was recently made acquainted with
(please). The gist of both was that
millenials (a term undefined in either article but we’ll let that slide for
now) are leaving the church because they find it irrelevant. That could be, but it’s also true that for
the last few decades almost everyone leaves the church they grew up in between
the ages of 18-25 and only a small percentage of them ever come back (to any church). I do not deny the possibility that this is
the church’s fault, but I also think the generation itself bears some
responsibility. And, let’s not forget,
there is an Enemy who wants to keep people out of church and those years are an
especially vulnerable time for everyone as we try to figure out our place in
the world and where in it we go to get married, find a job, make meaningful
friends, etc.
Getting to more specific charges (which were also the
charges made 10, 30 and 2000 years ago), the millenials don’t want a
superficial church (amen!). They want a
church that deals with real issues, like how to serve the poor (locally and
globally). They also (in both articles)
want to be assured that the church will treat well their friends who are living
in unrepentant sin.
That one bugs me. It
was in both articles, but neither offered a recipe or outline for what the
author/blogger was hoping the church would do (just a vague fear that we would
inevitably do it wrong). As a person who
fights cynicism on an almost daily basis (some days I just give in to it), what
I am thinking when I read such blogs is that they want the church to welcome
their friends in no matter what and ignore or rationalize the sin away. I have a problem with half that statement
(the second half). At the church where I
serve, our motto is, “Welcoming everyone, wherever you are, to be a growing
follower of Jesus.” I stand by that and
we work hard to make it true. We try to
welcome everyone (and I think we do a pretty good job), but we’re not satisfied
to let ourselves or anyone who worships with us stay where we are. Is the sin in question sexual, verbal,
physical, mental? Doesn’t matter. We want to provide a loving environment in
which the Holy Spirit can help us work together not to embrace sin but to let
that Spirit wash it away. I hope this is
what the Millenials want.
As to the poor, I agree that most churches aren’t doing as
much as we can to help the poor. And, if
you read back through Jesus’s words—as well as the rest of the Bible—you’ll
find that taking care of the poor and ministering
to them is a high priority. I appreciate
that these Millenials want churches that will take up that mantel, but I wonder
if they realize that most of these churches that they are leaving in droves are
ministering to the poor already. Maybe
it’s not in a big way, and certainly, it can be done better, but it is being
done. These churches the Millenials are
looking down on and walking out on, they are participating in a soup kitchen,
gathering clothes against winter for the underprivileged and taking worship
services to care homes and orphanages.
I would encourage any Millenial (or anyone else) who would
like to see their church minister to the poor to a] jump in with an existing
ministry, 2] strengthen that ministry, so that they can c] have the standing to
suggest ways the ministry can be expanded and improved upon! It’s a lot easier, though, to either just
drop out or jump to another church that already has the program together and
all you have to do is plug in.
Instant gratification.
That’s what’s really desired
here, by Millenials, Gen-X’ers (which is what I think I used to be—or maybe I
was Generation Y, as in, “Y do we keep coming up with these stupid labels?”)
and everyone else. We want what we want
now. No 40 years in the wilderness for
me!
This is the real reason people of all ages have left and are
leaving the church. It really has very
little to do with style of music, outreach to the poor, or the church’s stance
on whatever the sin du jour is. By it’s nature, any church worth it’s salt is
going to provoke its members/attendees/adherents/whatever to be something they
aren’t. To minister to both the poor and
the rich, to look out for orphans and widows, to love and good deeds, to take
up your cross, to be holy. But in a culture where we are each told our
own personal hearts are the best and final arbiter of what is right or wrong,
to go into a building where some man or woman points to an ancient book and
says, “Jesus is the way and this is his map” … well, that just ain’t hip, dude.
I do think the church needs to change. There are things we do only because we have
always done them—not because they work (pragmatism), because they never
did. There are things we don’t do for
the same reason. And I want to keep
asking questions about these things that are, in reality, just forms, not
substance. I want to find the substance,
hidden though it may seem at times. And
I don’t want to leave the church to “find something better” because—from where
I sit—it seems that most who do so quickly stop looking and settle for nothing. I want to stay in the church and try to make
it better—not by my standards but by God’s.
P.S. My spell-checker
really hates the first sentence of this blog, recognizing neither “blogs”,
“millenials” or “Facebook”.
I have been a member of the same church since I was 6 and I haven't been in the last 5 years which makes me sad and I miss it. However..since not attending, I spend more time in prayer, worship and my bible than I ever did when I attended. What I was doing was raising my children in church and they are gone. That is a lousy lame excuse because I promised to support my church with my tithes and time...I still do the first part but am stingy with my time. Every fall I say...we are going to church this year. It's not my church..it's me and becoming a very private secluded person...life isn't over and I will be back!
ReplyDeleteThe Enemy is working diligently and hard at deceiving many and it is paying off. I am one of those who always had an excuse for not going to church.. For a long time it was because, when I did go to a new church, I kept finding things that were taught that I didn't agree with (and neither did the Bible!). So I would leave. A friend of mine finally pointed out that I was never going to find a perfect church, and if I did they probably wouldn't let me in. I realized he was right about that - especially the last part. I finally just joined the church led by a friend of mine. It is not perfect, but like all of us it is a work in progress. At least I'm there working to point out anything not scriptural in their teachings. We don't have many young people in our church., Some drop in occasionally, and then usually drift away after only a couple of visits. We have not figured out a way to change that trend yet either. We're not going to compromise on what we know to be the truth. We pray for those souls and hope they come back some day after the seed we planted has been nourished and grown by the Holy Spirit. That's what happened with me, after all. I pray it happens for those who leave before it's too late.
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